Fort Worth Motorcycle Riders

Telomere wrote:So, if you got married to a woman who said you had to quit riding, would you?

I'm smart enough to not marry a woman who would make me stop riding. If you have a problem when we first start dating it probably won't work out. But as far as a a wife finally having enough of me riding, yes i would stop.

Prenup would state....
All changes in ones being and self indulges would be of ones own choosing. Any cohersion or demands put forth by opposing party would open the possibilities of the marriage being null and void and each party would have grounds to go their seperate ways with what they came into the marriage with if said party so chooses.

I'll have to pitch in with miles here, I don't see it as a requirement, having a woman that rides vs having a woman that tells you, that you have to quit are a universe apart.

If she doesn't ride but doesn't care if you do, that works, if she rides, thats a plus.

milesmiles wrote:

Telomere wrote:So, if you got married to a woman who said you had to quit riding, would you?

I'm smart enough to not marry a woman who would make me stop riding. If you have a problem when we first start dating it probably won't work out. But as far as a a wife finally having enough of me riding, yes i would stop.

I didn't see this when I posted, are you saying if your wife asked you to stop riding, you would?

Firewa11 wrote:

WillK675 wrote:How can you neglect your motorcycle for your social life? The motorcyle is what makes up ones social life.

Equals

Firewa11 wrote:

WillK675 wrote:How can you neglect your motorcycle for your social life? The motorcyle is what makes up ones social life.

+38

fixxervi6 wrote:

milesmiles wrote:

Telomere wrote:So, if you got married to a woman who said you had to quit riding, would you?

I'm smart enough to not marry a woman who would make me stop riding. If you have a problem when we first start dating it probably won't work out. But as far as a a wife finally having enough of me riding, yes i would stop.

I didn't see this when I posted, are you saying if your wife asked you to stop riding, you would?

Yes i would stop, but as you see i really don't have to worry about that happening, because of what i first stated. In the case that i did i would stop riding after serious discussion. I love my bike and i love my wife, but my wife is more important than any bike. Truth be told if something like this did happen it would seem there is more of a bigger issue than riding.

I completely disagree with you miles. I don't care how much you love someone. You don't tell someone that they have to stop doing something they love because it changes who that person is. You learn to live with them doing what they have a passion for or you start to join their world to see why they are so passionate about it. You just don't give that person an ultimatum.

but to marry a 12 yr old you need to get parents consent and when you start doing what a 12 yr old says you have a serious problem

Zixxer6R wrote:but to marry a 12 yr old you need to get parents consent and when you start doing what a 12 yr old says you have a serious problem

When they are that young, you can mold them to like what you like

Miles I dont think you'll ever be married. Unless Casey Anthony allows one to become of age

milesmiles wrote:Yes i would stop, but as you see i really don't have to worry about that happening, because of what i first stated. In the case that i did i would stop riding after serious discussion. I love my bike and i love my wife, but my wife is more important than any bike. Truth be told if something like this did happen it would seem there is more of a bigger issue than riding.

Despite giving you a hard time, I 100% agree with this. I love riding, but a woman I marry will (hopefully) be more important to me. And there are a lot of legitimate good reasons to stop taking that risk.

That said, like you I hope to spend my life with a woman who supports my addictions hobbies.

Well Tele, thats why i said at the bottom, that if that was to happen that their is probably a bigger issue than riding and also when i said after serious discussion. If the person really did love you then they wouldn't ask you to nor would you have to. Bottom line when it comes down to it they are the one i love if i could "die for them" then i could put the bike down for them.

I am sorry but I don't agree. She needs to be okay with it before you decide to take that plunge and not change her mind and try to change the person she fell in love with. I don't think someone should have to give up their hobbies (no matter how expensive or "dangerous" they are) once you are married. I don't think you should put your life on hold because your significant other is not willing to take that risk. I am not saying she isn't important or anything but you chose to include her in your life and she would have to learn to deal with it and love you for who you are (and the decisions you make) or decide to not spend the rest of her life with you. I think if you two have a love for the same hobbies, then that is one more thing to bring you closer and you get to to spend more time together.

To me its not about choosing between the bike or the woman, thats not the base issue, thats the symptom of the problem, not the problem itself.

fixxervi6 wrote:To me its not about choosing between the bike or the woman, thats not the base issue, thats the symptom of the problem, not the problem itself.

I never asked you to choose between me or the bike or me and the tank. I have no issues with you doing what you love because that is part of the reason why I love you . I just hate the gearing up in the frakin heat (I know you are passionate about it and don't give a rats ass about the gearing up in the heat...more power to you ) and I wish we lived closer to some flooded caves, dry caves (not that we can go caving at this moment in time) and some nice crags.

This goes back to the old joke

Women marry a man thinking they can change him, Men merry a woman thinking she'll never change. ha! Stupid people.

Well my dad was a sniper in vietnam. When he came back he could have gotten any job on a "swat" team or just regular patrol, but my mom said no more guns. My dad chose not to go that route and they have been married over 40yrs now. Of course we have tons of guns in the house and shoot regularly, but knowing that he made her happy has made him happy. I'm not saying it was the right or wrong decision and i know it's not for everyone, but if i could model my life after anyone it would be him. That's just how i get my viewpoints. So....scavenger hunt!, i'm going home this weekend to see the folks and hope to rack up some points in my old home town woot woot!...also it may be my 10yr high school reunion

I see what you are saying and I understand it. But I would never ask Fixxer to stop doing any activity because I thought it was dangerous. I think I participate in almost every hobby he has with him. Some he is more passionate about, and I am cool with that.

You have fun with that 10 year reunion. I have never gone to any of mine and I don't think I ever will. Take the bike you will make a hell of an entrance (unless you had one 10 years ago then forget about it).

I'm not saying that things don't change, or relationship dynamics don't change over time. That's what makes relationships work, being flexible to one another and understanding coming from both sides. I would never go into a marriage with someone that asks me to give up something that I love, because I too would never ask them to give up something they love. Because I would never CHOOSE to be with someone that out of their own selfishness or fears ask me to change to make them feel better about themselves (or less fearful, etc).

That being said, if something changed dramatically in the relationship, then there might be a reason to quit riding, but it would be MY CHOICE, it would be a decision that I made for myself. I wouldn't quit because my wife told me to quit riding. Because if I did, then I'm going to resent her for it, and that's never healthy for any relationship. Sure, I may weigh in her reasoning for me quitting riding and take that into account in my decision making, but it won't be a direct reason for it. And in the end, it would be my choice.

The deciding point for me was kids.

It's one thing to be married and argue over whether you want to give up the thing you love for the person you love. It's a whole different story (to me) when there's kids. Especially if one spouse doesn't work, or they both do the dangerous thing together. If both parents are on the same bike and die in a crash, who takes care of the kids? To me, it's unfair to ask kids to accept the risk of losing both parents. It's not like they had a choice in whether to be born to risk-taking parents the same way an adult has a choice whether to marry a risk-taker.

That said I wouldn't necessarily give up riding just because I had kids. But if I had kids and a stay-at-home wife and she asked me to stop riding because of the risk to her and the kids, I'd probably quit riding.

Firewa11 wrote:I'm not saying that things don't change, or relationship dynamics don't change over time. That's what makes relationships work, being flexible to one another and understanding coming from both sides. I would never go into a marriage with someone that asks me to give up something that I love, because I too would never ask them to give up something they love. Because I would never CHOOSE to be with someone that out of their own selfishness or fears ask me to change to make them feel better about themselves (or less fearful, etc).

That being said, if something changed dramatically in the relationship, then there might be a reason to quit riding, but it would be MY CHOICE, it would be a decision that I made for myself. I wouldn't quit because my wife told me to quit riding. Because if I did, then I'm going to resent her for it, and that's never healthy for any relationship. Sure, I may weigh in her reasoning for me quitting riding and take that into account in my decision making, but it won't be a direct reason for it. And in the end, it would be my choice.

Yep, it would be different if I was approached with "I would like for you to quit becaues of X but if you don't I understand"

vs.

"listen here, that ring, that means your my bitch, and when I say your going to quit riding, your done, you understand?"

Rhino wrote:The deciding point for me was kids.

It's one thing to be married and argue over whether you want to give up the thing you love for the person you love. It's a whole different story (to me) when there's kids. Especially if one spouse doesn't work, or they both do the dangerous thing together. If both parents are on the same bike and die in a crash, who takes care of the kids? To me, it's unfair to ask kids to accept the risk of losing both parents. It's not like they had a choice in whether to be born to risk-taking parents the same way an adult has a choice whether to marry a risk-taker.

That said I wouldn't necessarily give up riding just because I had kids. But if I had kids and a stay-at-home wife and she asked me to stop riding because of the risk to her and the kids, I'd probably quit riding.

Staying off the bike doesn't mean you'll live tho.

That just means you better have your ducks in a row, life insurance and a will.

Everything is risk / reward, weight it out and consider both sides, if you have kids it should be a factor in your risk / reward weight out, but not the only deciding factor.

I'm guilty of the lack of a will, its on my to do list.

fixxervi6 wrote:Staying off the bike doesn't mean you'll live tho.

That just means you better have your ducks in a row, life insurance and a will.

Everything is risk / reward, weight it out and consider both sides, if you have kids it should be a factor in your risk / reward weight out, but not the only deciding factor.

I'm guilty of the lack of a will, its on my to do list.

True.

I'm not saying anybody else should do it my way, I'm just saying that's where my risk/reward line is at.

I'm guilty of the lack of will too. Let me know if you find a good attorney.

You only need a will if you a) have something worth giving to some one, and b) have someone to give it too.

fixxervi6 wrote:I'm guilty of the lack of a will, its on my to do list.

I told you all we need is the money because I have a friend that will do up a will/trust for us. So, start working the corners, baby